Top Five: Horror Movie Villains

I will start this post with starting that while these movies themselves may not be scary, they did frighten the shit out of me when I was a kid. Yes a kid, I had a lot of older cousins who enjoyed putting in a VHS tape and allowing me to be scared shitless. Today’s standards of horror seem much different than those of my childhood, a lot of the time horror plays upon gore and violence rather than the character study in malevolent evil. The latter is what made the following movies stick with me long after I had finished watching them, some so much I have never been able to watch them since.

(5)Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th: Jason Voorhees was a child who drowned on Friday 13th at a summer camp at Camp Crystal Lake because the councillors spent more time getting laid than paying attention to the children in their care. A year after this the camp closes down after a brutal double murder on the same date. 20 years later the camp is set to reopen on Friday the 13th when a new set of horny councillors arrive at the lake. Ignoring the warnings of the crazy old man that they are all “doomed” the councillors set up camp but soon discover the warnings where real and that a machete slaughtering maniac is out to get them! I remember clearly when I first watched this movie, it was with my cousin Steven and it was the day before we headed off to a church summer camp at Crawfordsburn. What made this movie scary was that when we turned up for a two week stretch at camp it looked exactly like the movie. Big cabin in the clearing of trees in the middle of know where, or so it seemed to our childhood imaginations. The story of a little boy seeking revenge on those who failed him and though we went to camp as kids not councillors it still held a fear to us when exploring the campsite

(4) Michael Myers – Halloween: A psychotic murderer institutionalized since childhood for the murder of his sister, escapes and stalks a teenage girl and her friends while his doctor chases him through the streets. That’s a horror movie! The think about Michael Myers is that he is seemingly unstoppable. A mythic, elusive bogeyman, with superhuman strength who cannot be killed by bullets, stab wounds, or fire. The fear came to me more from the mask, that it could be anyone behind there, the fact that he also does not speak compounded that fear. It was again my cousins who put this on when I was a kid and allowed me to sit through it. This man this manic escaped from a lunatic asylum made it all so real, like he lived just up the road. The fact that he killed his sister was also horrific to me, further to this he kills anyone connected to his family including their friends!

(3) Chucky – Childs Play: Charles Lee Ray a serial killer known as the Lakeshore Strangler is brutally shot outside a Chicago toy store but uses voodoo to transfer his soul into a doll “Chucky”. In doll form Chucky manipulates a little boy to help him kill off the people responsible for his death before attempting to sacrifice him in order to regain a human body! It was my cousins who first sat me down to watch this movie, and though in later life I have watched the sequels that are more comedy horror “The Bride of Chucky “and “The Son of Chucky” I have never watched the original trilogy again. The aspects of voodoo, and a serial killer living inside a kid’s toy frightened me so much that I fell asleep staring at the cupboard in my room for fear of toys creeping out to kill me! I even once yelled out for my granny waking my cousin david in the process!

(2)Freddy Krueger – A Nightmare on Elm Street: A paedophile child killer who is hunted down by a mob of angry parents, cornered in a boiler room where he used to take his victims, and burnt alive. Of that’s not scary enough how about the when he comes and haunts people in their dreams, horribly using a glove armed with razors. It get worse when he kills his victims in their dreams, it causes their deaths in the real world as well. I once again was introduced to his horror by my cousins, and it was the cause of 3 weeks of a very scared Scott who was too afraid to go to sleep, and threats by my mum not never let me come back to Larne again. What scared me the most is that you can’t escape sleep, the whole paedophile thing never really was understood by me at that age! I have not watched the movies since and haven’t had the balls to watch the new remake!

(1)Pennywise – IT: Pennywise the Clown, the most terrifying evil creation that Stephen King ever devised. This demonic entity would disguise himself as a clown or other terrifying things based on the subject’s worst fears. As a clown he would attract children so he can capture and kill them as they are an easier target. I am not sure when I first watched this movie, I don’t even think I watched it the whole way through I just watched bits. I have never read the book and doubt that I ever will, clowns scare the absolute hell out of me, always have from my earliest memories. Clowns are freaky, something not right and down right malevolent evil sinister looking things. The face hidden behind a painted smile what’s even real about them!

So there you have it my Top Five Scariest Horror Movie Villains, remember if someone you like isn’t on here or someone you hate is, this is my list, but please get in touch via comments and let me know who you would have had on it! Most of these are my own personal fears attached to them and are pretty old school!


Top Five: Doctor Who Enemies

I find it fitting that on today, The Day of the Doctor, I lay out my Top Five: Doctor Who Enemies.  Later on this evening the 50th Anniversary show will be aired and everything we know is set to change!  Over the past 50 years The Doctor has faced many many terrible foes. The following are my Top Five!

(5) The Great Intelligence: The Great Intelligence has no physical form and thus relied on possession of living creatures to manipulate its environment. It existed on the astral plane and could enter the people it encountered. It allowed Padmasambhava to live over 300 years while he created the Robot Yeti and it also reanimated dead bodies like Staff Sergeant Arnold. It has considerable mental powers such as mind control and can even mentally attack the Doctor, causing him great pain, and travel through time and space. The Great Intelligence could also manifest itself in simple forms such as a slime that glow brightly, a dense fog that consumed anything that enter it, and a poisonous web that can trap the Doctor’s TARDIS and could not be destroyed by chemicals, explosives, and flamethrowers.  The Great Intelligence first appeared in 1967 as an foe of the second incarnation of the doctor and then nothing more was heard of it  for 46 years. It Finally revealed  itself to the the eleventh doctor as the entity thats been working all that time behind the scenes to destroy the doctor.  The Great Intelligence lay quietly scheming and attacking The Doctor from the shadows, never letting him know that it was him, thats a real enemy, the one you dont know whos behind it

(4) Vashta Nerada: Vashta Nerada meaning “the shadows that melt the flesh” now if thats not scary i don’t know what is!  Vashta Nerada occur naturally on most planets in small clusters, not unlike the dust particles sometimes seen in sunbeams. While small swarms pose no threat and survive on dead animals, large swarms could strip a creature to its bare bones in milliseconds. The Vashta Nerada live in the darkness and mimic the shadows, a microscopic enemy that can only communicate by reanimating the remains of the dead now thats a scary advisory.  The Vashta Nerada are also extremely hard if not impossible to kill. Even the spores that lived in trees that were later smashed down into pulp to make paper for books where later able to hatch and swarm.  The photo on the right shows Vashta Nerada inhabiting a corps in a spacesuit in the episode “The library”.  In The Library, The Doctor encountered a planet sized swarm of Vashta Nerada, at the Library, a planet sized library whose books where printed from the forests that the Vashta Nerada once inhabited.  Vengefull the creatures began their attack on the Library. Thankfully The Doctor brokered a deal allowing the humans off the planet and leaving the Vashta Nerada in their “forests” of books.  An army of billions of microscopic life forms that live in the shadows, ready to strip the meat of your bones in seconds, now thats a emeny!

(3) The Weeping Angels: Known as “The Lonely Assassins” the Weeping Angels according to The Doctor “are as old as the universe or very nearly, but no one really knows where they come from.”  Described as the loneliest beings in the universe, since their quantum-lock reaction makes it difficult for them to socialise.  Quantum-lock meaning they turn to stone when anything looks at them.  Hence why they hold their hands to there face, for fear of looking at eachother and so forever being locked. Turned to stone while being watched you dare not blink as they can move at an incredible speeds.   It’s not clear whether all Weeping Angels resemble angel statues or if perhaps any statute could in fact be revealed as a Weeping Angel, even if it did not have an angel appearance. It has been said that statues can be infact taken over so who knows! The touch of an Angel hurls their victim back in time, allowing the Angel to feast on the potential energy of their unlived days.  The Weeping Angels always give me the spine chilling sensation of dread.  They maybe bring back childhood fears of the monster under the bed or that o so certain feeling you’re being watched in a graveyard by the statutes.  Described as the deadliest, most powerful, most malevolent life-form evolution has ever produced and that if you so much as blink your dead. Now thats an enemy

(2) The Daleks: Although the Daleks look entirely robotic, they are in fact cybernetic organisms, a biological body encased in and supported by a protective outer shell of metal armor. Daleks’ bodies have mutated so drastically from their Kaled ancestors that they have lost all humanoid appearance save for one eye and have purged every emotion except for hate, leaving them with a desire to purge the Universe of all non-Dalek life. They have been compared over the years with Nazis due to the lack of individuality, an unquestioning obedience of orders and a willingness to die for the race.   The evolution of the The Daleks has changed over the years, once only gliding and being foiled by stairs later abilities included flight and teleportation.   The Daleks are one of the most feared races in the universe and most frequent foes of the Doctor, having faced him several times in every one of his incarnations. They are the source and focus of all his fury and hate.   The most scary thing for me is that one glowing eye and the staccato harsh tone and rising inflection of the Dalek voice.  EXTERMINATE!!! The Doctor has stopped them on several occasions but somehow they just keep coming back! A race of mutant hyper intelligent beings whose only emotions are hate, now thats an enemy.

(1) The Master: A childhood friend of the Doctor, the Master was driven insane after looking into the Untempered Schism on Gallifrey at the age of eight. Like the Doctor, he fled from the Time Lord’s home planet in a stolen TARDIS. However the Master and The Doctor’s motives differ greatly. Unlike The Doctor who “makes people better” The Master as his name suggests seeks only to rule, subdue and dominate. To be overlord of all the galaxies to be “The Master”. The Doctor said that The Master went mad when at the age of eight when, as part of Time Lord initiation, he looked into Untempered Schism. The drumming in his head that apparently drove him mad was later revealed to be a signal retroactively placed in his mind by the Time Lords during the Time War. This leave the thought in my mind that what will the master do now he knows it was his own people who drove him crazy. I have always seen The Master as The Doctors ultimate nemesis. I see the relationship between them as a paradox, The Master is The Doctors enemy but also his friend, more than that he is a brother. If one wins they both lose. I think at the core they both know this and for all of their fighting I believe neither one wants to defeat the other. To me that is the greatest enemy the enemy that is a friend.

There you have it, my Top Five: Doctor Who Enemies.  This is my personal Top Five and there is so many greats that could be on the list so if someone you don’t like is on it or if someone you do like is not, get in touch via the comments section.  I would love to hear who you would of seen on your list.

Top Five: Badass’s With Eye Patch’s

Eye patches are most badass of all fashion accessories, in fact they are the only badass fashion accessory.  I have listed below my Top Five Badass’s With Eye Patch’s.  The rule is that there must be a patch, magical eyes or strips of cloth don’t count so Mad Eye moody from harry Potter and Dilios from 300 cannot be in the final cut!

(5) Nick Fury: Colonel Nicholas Joseph “Nick” Fury head of SHIELD, herder of Avengers and all round badass of the world. This is the guy who wrangled up thunder gods, super soldiers, Russian spies, and genius billionaire playboy philanthropists and turned them into the worlds mightiest heros.   Nick Fury has trained as a paratrooper, Ranger, demolitions expert and vehicle specialist.  He is a seasoned unarmed- and armed-combat expert, was a heavyweight boxer in the Army, and holds a black belt in Tae Kwan Do and a brown belt in Jiu Jitsu. He may not be an actual superhero, but Nick Fury is still one of the baddest, toughest and most long-lived characters in the Marvel Universe.

Why the eyepatch? In comic book canon, it’s because he took a piece of shrapnel to the eye while at war.  Bazookas, grenades, borderline suicidal schemes and beating up Nazis probably played a hand in it.

(4) Odin: Odin “The All-Father” warrior-king of Asgard, father of Thor, Loki and Tyr , the chief God in Norse mythology and all round badass of the Gods. Need proof? Odin once punched a giant wolf in the face and then tied it up and laughed at it with a bunch of other guys from Valhalla. For fun. He can drink any other God under the table. Armed by the mighty magical spear Gungnir, forged by the dwarves and enchanted it so that it magically never misses its target. Odin is the all-powerful ruler of Asgard. As such, he is wise, honorable, and dedicated to keeping the peace between the Nine Realms.

Why The Patch? Odin originally had two eyes, but he traded one of them for a drink from the Well of Wisdom, which gave him the knowledge of everything that has happened and will happen.

(3) General Chang:  In Star Trek original universe cannon General Chang was a Klingon officer and chief of staff to Gorkon, Chancellor of the Klingon High Council in 2293. In that year, Chang was involved in the conspiracy to sabotage peace talks between the Klingon Empire and the United Federation of Planets.  Check out Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country.  Star Chang enjoyed meeting Captain Kirk, whom he regarded as a fellow “warrior” and the two could have been best friends if they were not enemies .  What puts him in my list is that his patch is bolted onto his face and that he is a Shakespeare buff who quotes the Bard in the middle of a chaotic space battle… Thats bad ass!

Why The Patch? General Chang lost his eye in a blood duel against the usurper Kalnor who attempted to gain control of the Klingon Empire.  You have to hand it to the Klingons, blood duel sounds so much cooler than fight.

(2) Snake Plissken:  S.D. Bob “Snake” Plissken is a bad ass ex- U.S. Army Special Forces Lieutenant and war hero in World War III turned criminal. Snake portrayed by Kurt Russell, the films Escape from New York and Escape from L.A.  Some facts about snake courtesy of Cracked.  1, Snake Plissken is fucking badass,  Even looking at him can cause injury.  2, If there was an opposite of Care Bears, they would be Don’t-Give-A-Fuck Snakes, and they would all look like Snake Plissken. 3, Snake can kill a lot of people with a sneer.  Snake really is a badass, need proof.  He had his personality and Psych profile loaded into an AI Robot. It went haywire, started thinking like Snake and rampaged. Snake has an unbelievable tolerance for pain. Beaten, shot, you name it and he keeps walking.

Why The Patch? He lost it in WWIII.  Sounds reasonable enough.

(1)One-Eyed Willie: One-Eyed Willie was a famous pirate who captained the The Inferno back in 1632.  Willie and his men sailed into the sunset many times carrying a vast amount of rubies, emeralds, and diamonds, along with a load of doubloons, and Spanish Reals. However after a cannon battle with the original owners of the “Rich Stuff,” Willie and The Inferno got trapped in a cave in Astoria, Oregon.  Here is where they waited, and the legend of One Eyed Willie and his treasure became the focus of many treasure hunters, all of whom never found it. Mikey, Chunk,Brand, Stef, Andy and Data went to find his “rich stuff” in the movie The Goonies. Willy is known for the creation and use of ingenious traps that could take down even the most experienced treasure hunters.

Why The Patch? He was born with only one eye socket.  This guys been patching it up since birth!  Now thats bad ass!

There you have it, myTop Five: Badass’s With Eye Patch’s.  Now to take a note from a friend, this is my personal Top Five so if someone you don’t like is on it or if someone you do like is not, get in touch via the comments section.  I would love to here who you would of seen on your list.

My Top Five: An Introduction

Top Five things has been a game that me and my friends have played since forever. It is fun game that sets the world to rights and makes you think what really is most important to you. Normally played while we are sitting in the pub or by the campfire! The Fun comes from coming up with new Top Five Lists and then from getting something on your list before the other! The rule we made was that if one of us chose something for our list then the other could not have it on their list.  I guess I will have no such competition but when the Lists start coming please do comment and leave me a word on what you would have had on your top five.  Please also leave a comment and get in touch with ideas for Top Five things I am always up for making new lists!